Number 4: Altered Sleeping Patterns
They sleep constantly or sleep never. This is a weird one. Narcissists sleep like babies, they claim. I claim the same; they sleep like babies in nightmares. They climb into bed, shut their eyes, but they never really sleep. Their body is always on standby. Their mind is active, though it’s not visible, because constantly having to maintain a false self 24/7 is draining. Existing in a state of virtual artificial values, assumptions, and fiction is draining.
The more they attempt to persuade themselves that they are special, irreplaceable, and invincible, the worse they break down internally because they’re not those things, and they must persuade themselves of it. It is not easy. They do not just wish to win; they wish to be adored, and it drains them to uphold that godlike illusion. So when it is nighttime and there is no one to perform for, they spin. Every one of those things that are repressed surfaces: the jealousy, paranoia, comparisons, and deep unspoken conviction that they are not worthy of love if they don’t perform. They do not even know what peace is.
It is just a burst of dopamine that will wear off on them. They are trapped in the storm they have brought upon themselves and cannot find their way out. So they get drunk, they scroll, and they creep you, trying to get that validation that they are needed. They rewrite conversations in their mind, distorting history, but they do not sleep, sort of, because you can’t sleep when your soul is weeping. When you are miserably miserable but won’t admit it, and always blame everyone.
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