Examples.
For instance, if their daughter decided to join drama club because it’s something they’re passionate about and excel at it, they may say things like “I don’t know why you’re wasting all your time in drama club is stupid! What are you going to do with that in the future? When I was your age I was into sport, you need to take up volleyball as I did”.
Her mother may never encourage her daughter’s true passion and talent for drama club by not taking the time to listen to her when she needs to talk about it, or never attending any of the events. Instead, she continues to downplay it and tells her she should have made a better decision as she did by playing volleyball, even though volleyball may not be something her daughter enjoys or excels at.
Over time, this plays with the daughter’s self-esteem and confidence and makes her start to second-guess her choices, making her feel like she’s incapable of making good decisions for herself or by herself. In some instances, this constant, intense pressure may make her give up on her dreams altogether to follow in her mother’s footsteps. The daughter may go ahead and play volleyball, even though she’s not happy and is much better suited for the drama club.
Just to try to get the love, support, and attention she so desperately desires from her narcissistic mother. Once she does, her mom will probably be really supportive in the beginning by helping her pick out her sneakers, getting all the accessories she needs, and excitedly coming to her first game. The daughter finally thinks she found the connection she so desperately wants and needs from her mother.
But nope, doesn’t quite play out as planned. Now her mother is criticizing her because she’s not a very good volleyball player, she tells her she’ll never be the player she was when she played. This further diminishes the daughter’s confidence and self-esteem. This is one example of how it can be living with a narcissistic mother.
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