The Cracks Begin to Show
You see, a narcissist doesn’t just fear being wrong. They fear being exposed. Their identity is so tightly tied to how others see them that when people begin to leave, withdraw, or stand up to them, it doesn’t feel like disagreement. It feels like death. The illusion begins to dissolve, and all the suppressed fears they locked away come crawling to the surface, like smoke through the cracks. It starts subtly. They will try harder to charm.
They will push harder to control. They will demand your empathy, even weaponize their pain. But underneath, panic is setting in. They are realizing the external world no longer reflects the image they tried so, so hard to project. And for a narcissist, losing control of their image is like losing oxygen. When the outside world stops validating them, the narcissist turns inward. But, of course, not in a healing way ever. Not to reflect or take responsibility. No, they retreat.
Desperation and Self-Supply
Into a fantasy world where they are still powerful, admired, and on top. They begin replaying old victories like highlight reel moments where they controlled, seduced, or dominated someone. They cling to those memories as proof that they’re still relevant, still wanted, and still something. It’s like watching a fading celebrity obsess over their past fame.
They will remember the way someone used to look at them, the applause after a speech, the desperate messages from an ex begging them to come back. They relive those moments not just to remember, but to feed. In those moments, they’re still the center, still adored, and still untouchable. This is how the narcissist tries to become their supply, in a weird way.
They talk to themselves in delusional affirmations, like my grandfather did toward his end days. They may also stand in front of a mirror, hyping themselves up. That looks crazy. They will scroll through old photos, reread old compliments, and revisit past conversations where someone idolized them.
It is all part of a desperate attempt to reconstruct their broken and falling-apart reality. But this self-supply has a shelf life because it’s not real. It’s borrowed energy from the past, and it cannot sustain them for long.
Eventually, the contrast between what they used to be and what they have now become becomes too painful to ignore. The past no longer inspires them. It taunts them. It reminds them that the world has moved on, and they have not. That is when their inner walls start truly, truly caving in.
You may also want to read this:
7 Signs That A Narcissist Is Done With You
What Happens To Narcissists When They Get Older?
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