Number 1: Obsession with Appearing Normal
The biggest sign that a narcissist may be using you to mask their true s£xual orientation is their aggressive obsession with being seen as traditional. While on the surface they may act indifferent or say, “I’m just a simple person,” underneath, their entire persona is engineered to follow societal rules so rigidly it’s unnerving.
They parade their heteronormative relationship like a trophy. They want to be seen attending weddings, talking about family values, having children, not necessarily for the joy of it, but because these are the symbols of what is acceptable, what is normal, what keeps people from asking a lot of questions.
You may notice how they interrupt conversations to brag about their marriage, talk about plans involving children, or constantly compare themselves to other “normal” couples in ways that feel rehearsed. When LGBTQ+ topics arise, they either ignore it completely or become oddly agitated, making comments like, “Why is this being forced on everyone?” or, “I just don’t get why it has to be so public.”
They will often say people should live and let live, while secretly orchestrating their lives to fit perfectly within cultural, religious, or patriarchal norms. They will insist they’re not concerned with what others think, but their entire identity is built around exactly that concern. This is not someone living authentically. This is someone hiding, and you are their most critical prop.
You may also want to read this:
Words That Destroy a Narcissist
9 Secrets ALL Narcissists Keep
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