Trick Number 5: Recruiting Other People Against You
Once a narcissist realizes that you’re on to them, they will find allies. You must know all about the games they play with friends, relatives, and anyone else. All of the sudden, you start hearing this from them: “Maybe you are overreacting,” “Why can’t you move forward and give them another chance?” “I am sure they mean no harm.”
Why? Because they have already made sure that everybody around you has a completely different view on everything. They have told another story, and they have convinced everybody that the one and the only person to blame is you.
And if you cannot stand behind your truth, what will you do? You will start doubting yourself. Instead of exposing their lies, you will defend yourself. Instead of sharing your pain, you will apologize and justify their behavior.
That is how they isolate you, especially towards the end, making sure that the rest of the world sees them differently from how you do.
Trick Number 6: Acting Like a Spiritual Person
This is probably the most destructive trick of all. Once the narcissist starts feeling that you are about to abandon them, they reinvent themselves, but they do not change. They suddenly become interested in self-improvement. They read books about healing, attend therapy sessions, meditate, pray, and talk to God.
They might say: “You know what? Last night God talked to me, and I realized my mission in life is to help people and make sure we live harmoniously.” “My mission in life is to love you and bring this family back together.” They say it with such determination and assurance that you do not doubt their intentions for a second.
Do you believe in growth and change? Do you believe that God can change somebody and make them a better person? If that is the case, you will easily fall for this trick and start believing that they are indeed changing. No. They are faking everything. This is not the same thing. They use words of healing and spirituality without having any intention of applying this to their lives.
Change is not happening because it requires a lot of effort, time, and commitment. They do not have it. They just want to take advantage of this spiritual language to buy time and convince you that they are better now.
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