Number 4: Flame shifting.
It’s yet another tactic the narcissist uses to make you look like the problem. Not only is nothing ever their fault, but they will shift the responsibility for their actions and blame you. Narcissists attempt to avoid all responsibility for any problems that arise in their lives.
Since their inner guiding voice is so critical and harsh, they blame someone else to avoid self-hatred. Accepting responsibility would cause them unbearable shame; they need to hold on to the belief that they are perfect. That being said it’s easier for them to believe that their emotions are the result of external factors.
In a nutshell, they believe you’re responsible for their feelings- particularly the bad ones. They conclude that since you didn’t follow their plan or made them feel vulnerable, you are to blame, you are the problem.
If they can get you to believe that you’re to blame, they can put any responsibility for the relationship on you making you look like the problem. If they can get others to see that you are also to blame, then others will know that you are the problem too.
10 Things to Expect When You Break Up With A Narcissist
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